51weeks(11moths)post 1st op and 21 weeks post the 2nd op-

Many things happened last week and I didn't have time to post really so here goes-
I have been trying to do some type of exercises  everyday, it is hard, im not as flexible and everything as I was before my operation but what I have noticed is that my lung function seems slightly better, that's got to be good right? I will do this military fitness test for NRC it maybe not turn out good but I am demand to try and have a go, I know the rest of the people have an advantage but I don't care
I started physiotherapy with my new physio Thursday, he isn't as easy going and laid back as my old one, he pushes you a lot, which I don't think is a good thing in moderation, I just don't want to be pushed too far, I see him again next Wednesday, the exact day when I turn 1 YEAR yes you heard it 1 year post op, I cannot believe that in nearly a week it would have been a year since my first operation. I also have Laser treatment next Thursday , my friend Millie is coming with me and my sister so it should be good, I haven't seem Millie in like a year! .:)
Another thing that is bothering me lately is people thinking that they think they know best. the truth and fact is that no-body does, its a part of life we are always continually learning.  the reason im saying this is because a person made a comment about small scoliosis curves, Apparently they cannot cause pain. But every persons scoliosis is their own, unique you will never find 2 alike at all. how does this person know that the scoliosis curves isn't causing pain? it is not her body so she cant say anything and cant judge. I'm also not saying I know everything because I certainly don't but i have done research and lived, experience this for the past 4 years, so i do know my fair share of things. my small scoliosis curve cause me a hell of a lot of pain, so i am example of what can stem of it. it Annoys me when people pre judge and think just because they aren't going through it or don't know about it that its ok to say wile things. its not on and shouldn't happen.
Kirsty xxxx

49weeks(11months) post 1st op and 19weeks(4months)post the 2nd!-

I have received a phone call this week from my old physio giving me all the details of when I start with the new physiotherapist, it is for next Thursday, Apparently he knows what he is doing so it should turn out ok. Whilst we are on the topic on exercise I had my very first post op run..well slow jog... it felt so strange! At first it felt like someone was kicking me in the back but after a while that subsided, i'm hoping to get fit enough for this fitness test!
Thursday I had my Second lot of Laser treatment, im not too sure whether it is working...my back is still the same, I only have 2 treatments left I am worried that it wont work just like the cream, how weird would it be to go through the rest of my life with no/numb feeling on the whole of back, ribcage and over sensitive areas on my thigh, lower back.  I had to try and put some suncream on my back the other day, it was so vile. Nasty almost. I know people who are a few weeks/months post op and have felt some odd burning/random sensations on the backs where the nerves/muscles are healing yet I have had nothing...for 11months! I wonder why its happened this way for me, I know it probably couldn't have been helped or stopped. I guess the damage is done and we just have to try deal with it.
My lower back is so sore this week, im not sure if this is because I am doing more or what but I do know that taking Paracetamol for my back does noting, Its just basically like me just eating sweets. I have taken an Ibuprofen today one of the ones I was first give when I went to my GP at the start, it is 600mg and it hasn't made a difference.. hope it goes away soon!
Kirsty xxx

48weeks(11months)post 1st op and 18weeks(4months) post 2nd op-

Nothing really happened last week it was quite boring really, I have just just been trying to do more with the horses, I will admit it is tiring but that is because im not used to doing it now that ive had a long time off! This week has been full of interesting stuff though, On Monday we went to my physio appointment to get there to be told it was cancelled apparently my physio was ill. It would have been nice to have been told before we had left the house but oh well. I mean it takes most people half an hour to get to the hospital and they tried ringing us at bloody 8:10am when my appointment was at 8:30am so not a good start, We then tried to re-arrange the appointment with my physio to be then told she had no more appointments available until she leaves! I have an appointment tomorrow now with a random physio. I hope to god she knows about scoliosis and spinal fusions and we actually do something or it will be another wasted journey! Today we were at ROH for my sisters pre-op, it went well she still has the lung function test, hyper extension x-rays and spinal cord monitoring test before the operation and then she will just have to wait for her 1 weeks notice, I know she is worried about it all but we are all there for her and I know she can do it! nothing will beat her<3 .
Ive finally had all my dates come through for my laser treatment, it seems to be every 3 weeks which is no so bad... I guess! I do hope they work, even if its just a little bit so my fingers are all crossed!
We had a letter today from the hospital to say my appointment with Mr Mehta had been rearranged, it was 29th of September now its a month later in October, This was suppose to be my one year check up but it seems the one year mark will have already gone by the time I have seen him! I would have liked to have gone through a few things with him, but I guess they may have to wait now.

On a slightly more positive note, i have an interview at the Northern Racing College!!!! Its is on the 18th or 19th of September, im excited about this as it is means my life can hopefully get back on track but the interview involves a military fitness test...I don't even know if i am aloud to do it! it involves running, sit ups and press ups and a lot more. I will admit i am super super unfit. i haven't properly exercised since i left school...like 3 years ago now? so i have a lot of work to do. I also have to obtain a letter from Mr Mehta to say i am fit enough to do the fitness test and the course, it will slightly hard now considering my appointments not until October...So i either have to ring his secretary or ring NRC and ask if there is any chance i can re arrange the interview for like November.. at least id be more fit then right?
kirsty:) xxxx

46weeks(11months) post 1st op and 16weeks(4months)post 2nd op-

This week has been great! I feel like I am finally starting to get my life back on track and I feel better this week than I have since the firs operation can this mean i'm on the mend to getting fully better? On Thursday I started my Laser acupuncture therapy, it was quite weird, its like a massive torch type thing that heated up, it then was put either side of my scar, my ribcage and my left thigh individually and it took around 30mins. The only down side to this is I have to wear lovely fashionable hospital gowns and some funky big sun glasses! I am having 3 more treatments of this and we will then review if it is working, if it does then I will get top ups every 4months if it doesn't then im not actually sure whats next (if there EVEN is a next), my next one is the 17th july.

Friday I was at a taster day at The Northern Racing College, it was fab, I really like it there, so I am defiantly going to Apply to do the 18week residential course there. (well it is a 12 week residential course and then 6 weeks work experience) The horses seem lovely and it looks a nice place, id love to learn about race horses. I am still uncertain on whether or not to ride there, they don't think I should as falling off is bound to happen, it will happen to most people usually the falls aren't bad but they could be, it only takes one fall and I could break my back or something or damage the very few vertebrae I have left, put that on top of other aspect of the course, my back probably wont cope. the non-ridden course does sound good though, you learn and do everything that the riders do minus the riding. The fitness test to get in is another story in its own it seems very hard, you have to get around a 7 on a bleep test and do other things like sit-ups, planking and so on. If you then get accepted you have to do Military Fitness 3 times a week which is part of the evening classes, its 7am-9pm days and you work one weekend then have from 11:30am(Saturday) until Sunday evening off the next one. I cant wait to send my application form off and see how everything goes,:)

More to the point today is International Scoliosis Awareness day, the only day people from all across the world team up in aid to raise awareness of this condition. people do fundraisers and other meet up in London (Hyde park) with SAUK the UK's only charity to raise money, awareness and help people that need it. Scoliosis Often leaves suffers feeling alone and have a massive affect on how they see themselves, I wanted to chance this, so a while back I started to write my personal story for SAUK which a few days ago I finished sent in and it was put on the website. I do not want people feeling the way I did as it didn't have to be the way and there was people to help..
So here is the link to my Personal story- http://www.sauk.org.uk/about-scoliosis/personal-accounts/kirsty-smith.html
I have also put some photos from Friday at the northern racing college!
Kirsty:) xxxxx

45weeks(10months) post 1st op and 15weeks(3months post op)-

My Physio has gone to France for a few weeks so I get until 7th July off going to physio, I'm still doing the exercises she left me to do but they are only trying to walk up the stairs properly and still trying to work on my walking, i am determent to get better, I want to be do everything again as I hate just still at home doing nothing, its starting to get really annoying boring and just not me at all but i know im not well enough to get a job or anything yet.
My sister is seeing Mr Mehta on Saturday for her MRI results, we are al hoping everything is fine and its all clear, Im guessing we are going to have a few appointments there for both of us in the next few weeks but they are all necessary.
Not much has happened over this past week, its been quite boring. My newer scar has started to irritate me again so i am hoping this laser treatment is going to help it i just hope we are not at the hospital for it next Thursday long as its very big areas they are treating.
I also have notice i am starting to just get my appetite back, i didn't eat a lot before the operation as i constantly felt full and i think it was due to have big my curve was but now i am eating slightly more which i guess is a good thing.
well heres to hoping next week isn't so boring!
kirsty xxx

44weeks(10months)post first op and 14weeks(3months) post second op-

Things are not going quite as expected with the capsincin (chillie cream) my pain management doctor gave me for the hypersensitive and numb areas on my body. I've been putting it on since april 2-3 times a day but I haven't felt a difference and I know lot of people which have used the cream, they all said to be careful  but I put it all over my thigh, ribcage  at first and I didn't feel a thing no tingling or burning like my PM doctor said. Even when i put it on my back there is still nothing. I thought I would have felt even the littlest feeling back but no. Nothing. My mom decided to ring his secetary as it was no point in waiting untill probably very late this year to see him again and I am having to have it all lasered after all, not the outcome I was hoping for but I have atleast go to try it,so I will be having 4lots of it before September when I see Mr Mehta again, like everything there is that chance it won't work but they hope it does and I do to! If not I will most likely either have to have gablapentin, a tablet for nerve damage or something or just get use to the fact that my back, ribcage is numb and I have hypersensitive patches.
I have recently being having stapping type pain in my ribcage it's the side which is deformed due to how my back was. It is horrible and I do hope it passes and doesn't stay, I really don't know what it could be or why it is there., I guess for now it is a mystery. I have stopped being sick yay! I am starting to feel better in myself because of this and I'm hoping it continues like this so I don't have to have the camera in the stomach.
Physio is going great so far, I'm happy with it at first I had some pain in my lower back,near the rods but it's not hurting as much now, I just get tired very easy. I have had one sessions few for a few weeks which is good, all of the muscles in my legs are very very weak and the muscle at the bottom of my leg is very tight so I have a lot of work to do. My physio said I walk the way I do because my body has gone in like defensive mode so I'm trying my hardest to walk more normally which is so so hard. It also seems to to be that my right leg is a lot weaker and I have to really think about what I want it to do in order for it to do it. I guess and I'm hoping it will get better in time.
I am going on a taster day at the northern racing college on the 27th June so I'm looking forward to having a look around and seeing if I want to go there when I'm fully recovered, there is two foundation courses a ridden one and a non-ridden one, I would love to do the ridden one but I'm not sure with my back so I'll ask about it all when I go, I'll also have the chance if I want to have ago on the horse racing stimulators, It will be very interesting to see if I am able to do everything like normal with my back. I suppose all anyone can ever do is try so that's exactly what I'm planning on doing. I've never let my back stop me before so why should this be an exception?
Kirsty xxxx

42 weeks(10months) and 12weeks(3months) post op- fading and forgetting?

When things no longer seem so dramatic, scary and worring, people start to loose interest. Well that's how it seems to feel anyway. Our brains go into over drive when something hard happens everybody wants to know how you are and just want constant updates on you there is a lot of support around you when you need it the most, more than you probably think. Its the 2 times now I have been in hospital recovering from my operations made me realise this, but it's not untill after the event has happened we stop and think how life changing it has been.
As it happens it's natural just to keep our head down and keep up the battle but it's when we finally procees what has actually happens people start to loose a lot of interest as they think it's over and done with but it's us that have the long long recovery.  It's hard when everyone, friends, family have stories of going out shopping or going for a hack in my case and all I had to say was the struggles of doing daily things like shuffling down the road or not even even able to put my own shoes and socks on.
For me it times lke this when life is truly put into perspective, while they are stressed over 'little' things like not being able o ride as it raining or other things, it hit me what actually could be lying around the corner from them.

Throughout my Entire journey with scoliosis, scheuermanns kyphosis and the surgery there hasn't been one day gone by when I haven't thought about my back.it will never leave you but like your scar(s) they will eventually fade and while It may seem now like people don't care or support you it's just that they have there own lives,  there own problems and other things that happen in life .
So if you are reading and feeling like nobody cares  just keep in mind, just because people don't speak doesn't mean they don't care or are not supporting you because they more than likely are.
Kirsty xxxx